Made-Of-Awesome Deviled Eggs

Deviled eggs are easy. Boil some eggs. Cut ’em in half. Mix up their insides with some mayo, some mustard, some salt and pepper. Scoop up the mix and stuff it back into the halved whites, which now serve as cups. Throw some paprika across the tops to make it look fancy and add some color (let’s be honest: THIS AMOUNT of paprika doesn’t amount to much flavor).

But like all other culinary revolutions happening in America, deviled eggs are experiencing it too. I made these over the weekend after spending the last 6 months or so perfecting my deviled eggs recipe. They were beautifully received.

Made-Of-Awesome Deviled Eggs:

-8 eggs (I use Egg-Land’s Best so I can tell myself as I am MUNCHING them that I am getting my necessary omega-3s)

-1/8 – 1/4 cup mayo

-1/8 – 1/4 cup spicy mustard

-1/2 cup LOOSE bleu cheese crumbles

-2 tablespoon Cholula or otherwise decent hot sauce

-3-5 tablespoons finely minced red onion, to taste

-salt & pepper to taste

-dill

Directions:

-Boil the eggs however you want. The older they are, the easier they will boil and most importantly PEEL. I like old, firm, hard-boiled eggs however I have roommates and they are also awesome. Also, one is my landlord. So to minimize stress within the household (while I know and understand old eggs aren’t necessarily bad), I try to keep onhand and boil new eggs. So: boil & peel your eggs. There are many recipes for perfect hard boiled eggs on Google.

-Peel your eggs. I suggest running cold tap water to help with the shells, and using old eggs.

-Slice your peeled eggs in half LENGTHWISE.

-Scoop out the hard-boiled yolks. Contain them in a plastic bag that can take some assault. Seriously. A Ziploc is fine but I hate brand endorsement and adverts in general so PLEASE contain them in whatever you think will work best. Also, READ THE REST OF THIS RECIPE. If you’re old enough to make deviled eggs you should already have read the entire recipe through (because that’s what you’re supposed to do with recipes, DUH!!). If you’re NOT old enough to make deviled eggs stop reading, put the knife down and go talk to your parents. If you can’t talk to them, get them to read this. NOW…

-Get all the egg innards into a plastic bag. Add the mayo, mustard, bleu cheese, hot sauce, onion, and salt and pepper. Close the bag as though you were sealing your SOUL inside of it. Like, vaccuum-pack it. Get as much air out as you can. Now, knead the hell out of it for about 7 minutes. Get all of the egg blobs and cheese crumble blobs and all other blobs to form a relatively uniform concoction.

-Cut off a very small corner at the bottom of the bag.

-The egg innards and other ingredients will now be referred to as “filling”. Using gravity, momentum, ingenuity and gentle fingers pipe the filling through the cutoff corner of the bag into the egg white cups. Fill tremendously. Any leftover filling, spread upon toast & give to your kids, your significant other, yourself, your pets, whoever will eat it. It’s really yummy but highly cholesterolic. FYI.

-Throw your lovely presentation of filled egg cups against your front door. Hard. REALLY HARD!!

-Yeah, that last step was a joke to make sure you are reading the whole recipe.

-Sprinkle dill over the tops of your filled eggs and arrange attractively. Make sure you hold a couple back or snag some before they get devoured. They WILL get devoured, I promise.

IMG_20140322_223147_028

Deviled eggs as in this recipe, before I threw a ton of dill all over them. They were happily received.

 

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I'm a writer living in Northern Colorado. I also help run the front of the house for the Fort Collins Bike Co-op. I have two cool roommates and a snorey cat. I love my life.

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